OpEd: Cannons

Peter Foster, Craven

December 10, 2024

Key points from this story:

• Features a drunken Confederate general.
• General Swynyard survives a near-fatal cannonball.
• He reforms after a life-changing experience.
• Liberals spent $57 million on firearm seizure.
• $25 million on feminine napkin machines installed.
• Total wasted spending exceeds $100 million.

I read a series of books on the American Civil War, written by an author by the name of Bernard Cornwell. The series sports a recurring character by the name of Swynyard, a drunken, unkempt, incompetent, foul-mouthed lout of a Confederate General that shows up into combat quite often falling down drunk! But one day, a 9-pound cannonball misses his left ear by 6 inches and blows the tree behind him to smithereens! It does not kill him, but knocks him senseless for three days.